Lydia checks her date's okcupid profile on her iPhone one last time while waiting at Starbucks.
"This picture is kinda blurry," she thinks to herself "and his face looks a bit long but he seems kind of cute. I hope this date turns out okay."
Just then a horse walks through the door, wearing shades with a bouquet of flowers in his mouth. He trots up to the table and drops the flowers.
"W... whats this?" stutters Lydia.
"Flowers (roses, daisies, vanilla, spring and more)," replies the horse.
A few seconds of silence pass.
"And much, much more...".
"So uh..." Lydia looks down at her phone, "Horse_ebooks, what do you do?"
"Horseracing is my favourite sport and it also supplies me with an addition"
Horse_ebooks stops mid-sentence to answer his phone, ringing in his saddle. He looks back at Lydia, noticeably distressed.
"The most dreadful thing that can ever happen to a horse owner has happened to John and"
Horse_ebooks doesn't bother finishing his sentence as he gallops out the door, leaving Lydia sitting at a table alone, sipping a pumpkin spice latte.