Sample:

Horse_ebook's date

Lydia checks her date's okcupid profile on her iPhone one last time while waiting at Starbucks.

"This picture is kinda blurry," she thinks to herself "and his face looks a bit long but he seems kind of cute. I hope this date turns out okay."

Just then a horse walks through the door, wearing shades with a bouquet of flowers in his mouth. He trots up to the table and drops the flowers.

"W... whats this?" stutters Lydia.

"Flowers (roses, daisies, vanilla, spring and more)," replies the horse.

A few seconds of silence pass.

"And much, much more...".

"So uh..." Lydia looks down at her phone, "Horse_ebooks, what do you do?"

"Horseracing is my favourite sport and it also supplies me with an addition"

Horse_ebooks stops mid-sentence to answer his phone, ringing in his saddle. He looks back at Lydia, noticeably distressed.

"The most dreadful thing that can ever happen to a horse owner has happened to John and"

Horse_ebooks doesn't bother finishing his sentence as he gallops out the door, leaving Lydia sitting at a table alone, sipping a pumpkin spice latte.

Price: 0
Date: 2012-02-07
Visits: 2848

These are comics inspired by @Horse_eBooks tweets.
 

Horse_eBooks is a twitterbot that, in an effort to bypass Twitter filters, posts random excerpts from its online book database. This results in PURE COMEDIC GENIUS. All comics are by Burton Durand, unless specifically noted.

Also, you can purchase original comic artwork! E-mail to author for pricing. Larger comics will cost a little more than 3-panel strips.

Price: 0
Date: 2012-02-07
Visits: 3577

This eBook is perfect if this is your first time or you are an experienced horse seller looking for that professional edge

I want to share with you how to:

• Prepare yourself, and your horse for the sale.
• The 9 simple secrets to getting photos which sell. Plus how to make videos that increase your chance of sale by 10 times!
• What you must know when handling time wasters.
• When to negotiate price and when not to.
• How to assess the market and set your horse's price.
• A simple technique for managing the first enquiry about your horse.
• Where and when is the best place to advertise your horse for the most effect.
• An easy 3 step system to showing your horse for sale.
• How to make sure you get your money.
• What support you can give the new owner to make your sale a success.
• How to handle both local and international sales.
• The truth about vet checks.

I'll also show you my very own 20 plus page Horse Selling Planner. The Horse Selling Planner makes it easy to sell YOUR horse with:

• Horse Condition Tracker
• Telephone sales script outlines
• Buyer contact sheet
• Training assessment record
• Templates to use for your Selling Calender plus many more...
• Forms to use to record farrier/vet service dates
• Price setting guide
• Advertising planner

Use all of these to create a... Click here to read the full description!

Price: 9.97
Date: 2010-07-23
Visits: 275

What you learn INSIDE 'MY MATHEMATICAL FORMULA' will knock your socks off, but don't just take my word for it. Find out what others say.....

• Turn odds of $1.25 ( 1/4 ) into odds of 100's/1 in a Few Simple Moves ....
• No need to understand handicapping ....
• No need to understand Horse Racing ....
• Just follow a few Simple Rules ....
• By Reading The Form Only ....
• Be correct on average 8 out of 10 times ....
• This is How You Can Make a Colossal Amount of Money

You Are Never Increasing Your Stake Money

Your Bank Is Never In Danger

Anyone can make selections that are correct 60% or 80% of the time, we all know that - But it's how you Place Your Bets That Counts - Your Staking Plan ! - And Mine Is The Ultimate Winner, there is No Other Plan That Can Compare To It...

Anyone can do it and it is easy! Just a quick scan of the racing form each day and a time investment of less than 30 minutes a week, earns me thousands of dollars per month. And I show you exactly how I do it, and how you can too starting 15 minutes from now.

Price: 69.95
Date: 2006-08-05
Visits: 1835

What Took Me Years and Years of Hard Work With a Top Trainer... You Can Get Your Hands On Today...In the Next 5 Minutes!

Here's Just a Small Piece of What You'll Learn Inside "Own a Fairytale Horse":

• Grooming the Mane and Tail for Show or For Sale
• How to Avoid Sun Burning or Sun Bleaching the Hair
• An Online Video on How to Make a Beautiful Rolling Plait
• Vitamin and Coat Supplements (They're NOT necessary!)
• How to Get a Thicker, Fuller, Shinier Mane and Tail!
• How to Grow a REALLY LONG Mane, Tail and Forelock
• How to GROW up to 3 or 4 Inches of Length Per MONTH!
• Why the Shampoos and Conditioners are Worthless!
• How to Untangle Horrible Matts and Tangles Easily
• The Only Six Items You Need to Groom Your Horse
• How to Stop a Horse From Rubbing Out His Mane and Tail
• Magic to Training the Mane to Always Stay on One Side
• The One Big Mistake You Must Never Make Again!
• How to Save the "Dreadlock" Style Mane and Tail!
• How to Eliminate Half Your Current Grooming Tools
• The One Item You MUST Get Out of Your Barn Right Now!
• How to Treat Fungus in the Mane and Tail
• How to Make Your Own Hair Polish for Mere Pennies
• How to Repel Dirt and Dust for Easy Maintenance
• Stop Lugging Big Grooming Boxes to Shows or Trail Rides

Price: 37.00
Date: 2010-05-20
Visits: 546

Thinking of taking the plunge and buying your first horse? Then our free ebook is for you.

• Learn how to decide the characteristics your perfect horse should have.
• Follow our step-by-step search procedure.
• Find out whether you're ready for a horse of your own.

Free ebook includes the Boarding Stable Checklist, Horse Budget Worksheet and Basic Horse Care Chart listed above.

Price: 0
Date: 2002-12-31
Visits: 4283

A Horse's Tale

$3.00 $1.99Add to CartPayPal or ClickBank

Buy Now and get a second ebook for free!!!
Click here to see the long list of these ebooks
(priced for $3.00 or less).

	Action: buy this eBook and write a review, and get a $7 coupon from Buy-Ebook.com Click to read rules.

CHAPTER I - SOLDIER BOY - PRIVATELY TO HIMSELF
 

I am Buffalo Bill's horse. I have spent my life under his saddle -
with him in it, too, and he is good for two hundred pounds, without
his clothes; and there is no telling how much he does weigh when he
is out on the war-path and has his batteries belted on. He is over
six feet, is young, hasn't an ounce of waste flesh, is straight,
graceful, springy in his motions, quick as a cat, and has a
handsome face, and black hair dangling down on his shoulders, and
is beautiful to look at; and nobody is braver than he is, and
nobody is stronger, except myself.

Price: 3.00
Date: 2006-02-20
Visits: 3624

"You Will Learn Horseback Riding Skills From The Safety and Comfort Of Your Sofa. Absolutely Feel More Confident Before You Go Riding!!!"

Here are just a few of the many Insider Horseback Riding Secrets you'll uncover immediately after ordering today:

• How to discipline your Horse the right way.
• Gripping the horses mane. Should you? We'll tell you.
• How to instantly recognize an outgoing friendly horse
• Understand how a horse thinks and sees. Very important for your safety!
• The earliest horses and how they have changed
• What are the easiest ways to mount and dismount a horse?
• A comparison of horse riding styles; English or Western. Which one is best for you?
• Which saddle might be best for you?
• Horse riding for people with special needs
• Controlling a horse is much easier once you have asserted yourself and gained the horses trust. We will show you how it's done!
• How to read a horse's body language and know EXACTLY what it means when horseback riding
• If you have children why not get them involved. It can be fun for them too.
• The horses ears and how it holds the key to how they are feeling
• What to expect on your second horseback ride, and your third and fourth
• What is a Bay horse? We'll tell ya
• The joys of horseback riding in a complicated world filled with clutter.
• Have to approach a horse from behind? We'll teach you the... Click here to read the full description!

Price: 29.99
Date: 2006-11-10
Visits: 1384

Horse Training

$4.95Add to CartPayPal or ClickBank

Buy Now and get a second ebook for free!!!
Click here to see the long list of these ebooks
(priced for $4.95 or less).

	Action: buy this eBook and write a review, and get a $7 coupon from Buy-Ebook.com Click to read rules.

Discover The Secrets to Becoming A Horse Trainer!

And lead them into the 2 main benefits below...

Teach Your Horse Whose the Lead Mare

• You can train your horse to go in the direction you need him to go. You will train him on stopping. You will train him to go forward, turn right and to turn left.
• You want your horse to think you are the lead mare. Then he will look to you for instructions. There is a way you can get your horse to think of you as the lead mare. As your horses lead mare, he will follow you and wait for you to tell him where to go.

Table of Contents

• Tips on Buying a Horse
• Secret to Training Your Horse
• Use Horse Training to Solve a Problem With Your Horse
• Lead Training
• Get Your Horse to Obey and Look to You for Instructions
• Mistakes Horse Owners Often Make When Loading Their Horse
• Teaching Your Horse Longer Sliding Stops
• Mistakes Horse Owners Make
• Tips for Beginning Trainers
• Leading Your Horse to Get Control
• Another Method of Loading a Horse in a Trailer
• Training the Horse to Know Voice Commands

Price: 4.95
Date: 2010-01-02
Visits: 1304
Ebook Type: PDF

A fully illustrated instructional guide showing exactly how you can go about making incredible profits on the betting exchanges.

What you'll learn...

• What factors really make a weak or false favourite.
• Professional staking strategies and betting bank management that will concrete your long-term success.
• My straightforward easy system to identify vulnerable favourites. - This is truly powerful information!!
• How to use clever tricks to further boost your profits.
• How to set up your bets hours before racing and count the profits later.
• How to make money like a Bookmaker.
• How to make money from 2nd Favourites.
• How to identify short-priced horses that lose 85% of the time! - And make huge profits.
• How to generate almost daily profits.
• How to examine the days racing and quickly find short-priced horses that are very likely to get beat!
• How to beat the SP Bookmakers are offering, so that you cannot lose!
• Every process fully explained, with screenshots so that even a total novice could follow.
• Complete beginners guide to laying horses and placing lay bets on the world's largest betting exchange -Betfair.

Price: 79
Date: 2006-10-05
Visits: 1274